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That’s Right, We BAD

In the classic 1980 movie Stir Crazy, Richard Pryor and Gene Wilder are framed for bank robbery and sent to prison. As they approach the cell, Pryor coaches Wilder to "get bad, or else you gonna get fucked" and by the time they reach the cell they're twitching and bouncing around like junkies.

"That's right... that's right, we bad," Pryor announces as they enter the cell. "Uh-huh, uh-huh, we bad. We don't want no shit, either."

"That's right," adds Wilder. "Darn right."

Well, he tried.

Now, the reason I bring this up is because it totally fits where you are once you simply have the Belief that you can be a badass, develop an Awareness of the various badassery you can access, and find the Direction of your chosen badassery.

That's right, you BAD, and you don't want no SHIT either.

But you can't be a badass going away from something.

Look, I'm not trying to be personal here, but chances are... if you're on the internet reading blogs about how to be a badass... you are stuck in some SHIT-hole of a life that you want to escape. You probably get up every morning and go to some soul-sucking job that you can't stand, then come home to a crappy apartment and a bunch of work you don't want to do just to keep you right where you are.

Most people are treading water, and don't even know how to swim.

The raw fact is that if you want to be a badass because it's the only alternative to not being a badass, if you're trying to stop being whatever you are, it's not going to work. That's beetle-brain shit. Just like one of those crappy little motorised cars that turns around and goes in a different random direction whenever it hits an obstacle or starts to go over an edge.

And you might think "hey, it's not getting stuck on the obstacle or falling over the edge!" - but look at what it does. It simply hits obstacles and almost goes over the edge. Over and over again. That's all it does. Ever. It never has any real purpose or any real direction, it just goes "ooh, that's bad" and runs away.

And that's what you get when all you're doing is trying not to get fucked. Hit something, turn and run. Get close to the edge, turn and run.

You probably never thought of this, but those cars can't go off a ramp. They'd get to the top of the ramp, then turn around and come back down.

Which means if you have one of those cars, you never get to take it off any sweet jumps.

Napoleon Dynamite takes a bike off a sweet jump... or not
Gosh! Shocks... pegs... lucky.

And this is precisely why all this bullshit about The Secret and the law of attraction pisses me off. It's all part of that dumbass fucking movement about "just sit on your arse and wait for your ship to come in" that leads to people playing the lottery as their retirement plan.

The lottery is a tax on people who are bad at math, which ironically funds public education in the hope that someday within our lifetimes we will graduate a whole class of children who are at the very least not so fucking stupid they play the fucking lottery.

In much the same way, running away from your problems is stupid because you are just going to run into new problems. If a thing in your life sucks, you can't just run away from it. You have to run toward something else - even your basic lizard-brain understands that.

And if you intend to ever really get anywhere, you have to get focused on a direction. Pull your dog-brain into the matter and fetch the ball, not just whatever happens to be out there.

Ever throw a ball for your dog and he brings back a stick? Of course not. That never happens at all. The dog knows to get the ball, not a stick, even if there's a stick out there.

But when you go running away from something, it's just like that pump-fake we do where we pretend to throw the ball and don't. The dog runs off looking for the ball, and can't find it. There's nothing out there for him to run toward, he's just running away from you in the direction he thinks the ball lies.

And a lot of marketers are pump-faking you. They say "Hey, boy! Want to make money online, boy?  Want to quit your shitty day job? Want to move out of your shitty apartment? Fetch the money, boy! Go get it!" but they never really throw anything so you get their products and there's nothing in them to bring back.

There's no money in it. There's no freedom there. Run from your shitty life, boy! Thanks for the seven bucks and oh by the way fuck you.

So next week we'll get the other half of this kicking.