beach

Hit The Beach

Okay, so we've powered through the beetle-brain and lizard-brain elements and it's time to get into the dog-brain. This is where the money starts to be made, so you should like this part.

And hey, you know how I've been saying I didn't plan this or lay it out or anything? Fuck that disclaimer. Here at the halfway point, I have fucking got this. I know every single element of this BEACHFRONT shit except the N, and I am pretty sure I can come up with something by the time I get there. The first couple bits were iffy, but now that I'm building up a head of steam, I'm laying this out like buckwheat through a goose. I am a leaf on the Goddamn wind, motherfucker. 

Besides, I'm sure I know an N-word or two.

Now, there is one unfortunate part of cramming an existing system into a word for a mnemonic device and that is the all-too-frequent moments when you have no choice but to use an awkward, unusual word that people give you screwface about. And we are at that part here.

The next thing you have to have is a front-end product. Which is followed by an OTO. Which is fucking simple because an OTO is just a very simple Funnel which starts with F and fucking A, dude, that's perfect.

But there is this pesky H in there. And I need some kind of way to say "front-end product" that starts with H. And that is going to be fucking awkward as shit.

Wow, from "fucking A" to "fucking awkward" in a single paragraph. I'd suggest that is some kind of record, but I'm pretty sure I could do it in one word if I tried hard enough and started with the right situation.

Like if I was in a synagogue and someone said "he said, you know, the N-word" and I loudly asked "Nazi?"

Well, there's probably not so much "fucking A" in that one. But zero to awkward in a single word, you know. The awk-word. I love words. They're my favourite toys. They're this wonderful thing with which one may play. Notice the mass of W's in there and then the hidden-W sound of "one" leading into the rhyming of "may play." Also the voiced diphthong similarity that opens the sentence.

Deep down, I'm a poet. There's just no fucking money in poetry.

But we have to get the awk-word out here, the one that kind of feels like it doesn't belong, but is also a very important bit. And it has to be - if you're going to use an awk-word, it can't be something throwaway. It needs to be worth the extra attention it gets.

So your Handiwork fits the bill simply because it's the first part where you're actually getting paid. This is your product; the thing you worked so hard to build, the thing your Contribution leads into when you give it to your Audience after you Engage them from your Blog.

Life's a BEACH, you know. I mean, you might not start from a blog, but this is the same thing. You have to drive them into your tribe by moving them along the process. And since we all know the monkey-brain stuff is coming next, that's where you start dealing with your tribe. You start fostering the community notion, and publishing more content just for them.

And we'll talk about that in, you know, half an hour or so. Unless you're in the archives, and you can just click the link. Either way.

But to quickly put those in the right order, you get out onto the BEACH by wrapping up the initial process with your Handiwork, and then you use a Funnel to start taking that to the next level. I've talked extensively about funnels in the past, most recently in the Check Out My Package post. So you know, have a look at that. At a bare minimum, have an OTO - that's like leading off with your expensive product just immediately offering them the ultimate for a simple yes/no answer.

But you can extend that out as much as you like, by putting even more fit and finish on your handiwork. Adding a furbelow, of sorts. My friend Colin Theriot likes to use lagniappe when describing bonuses and special add-ons. I like furbelow. It's an old 17th century term, and usually applies to a decoration on a woman's skirt.

That cracks me up. A decoration on the bottom half of a woman: fur-below. That sounds really, really filthy, doesn't it? I find it hysterical. I love words.

But for now, onward.